Better Learn to Say ‘No’

Anybody who is successful in life can tell you that it comes with a price. It would be nice if we could in fact have it all, be all to everyone, and engage or participate whenever we simply felt like it. The truth is, however, that if we’re ever to see a true sense of progress in our lives, there will be many times that the word ‘no’ will make a world of difference.

When you finally get that one priority in the right place, it becomes clear what you must do to stay on the right path. You realize that decisions you make will not only pertain to progressing in your purpose, but just as important, will also include the ability to say ‘no’. It is never possible to detect all that will come your way as you go through life’s journey, and life is sure to present some things and people who are impossible to ignore. But when determination is at its peak, the ability to say ‘no’ can and will make the difference between those who progress and those who don’t.

And exactly what is it we must learn to say no to? It is the times when you want to spend money you don’t really have. It is the times when you want to indulge in relationships that demean your own self-respect and respect for others. It is the times you choose to please others and appease their desires rather than stand firm on the better decision. Not only do these pits distract you and become a priority but they also become the bread and butter of what you are soon to reap. There may also be friends and/or family who will always be available to matter-of-factly inform you that you need a man/woman, you need to take a trip, you need to hang out and socialize, you need to make time for yourself. Do yourself a favor and not only listen to them, but more importantly, look at their lifestyle. Pay attention to the connection between their own decisions and the outcome of those decisions. Sometimes it’s almost laughable but mostly, your instinct to take notice will actually present the moment where your response hinges on either your ability to stay focused or will hinge on your weakness and inability to say ‘no’.

Lacking the ability to say ‘no’ on a constant basis will always keep you from progressing and succeeding. A weakness not to be ignored, there’s no way around the fact that it must be addressed. The need to please or impress, the need to fit and be a part of, the impulsive need to belong, the need to be better than others, and the fear of missing out, are all defects in and hindrances to a productive way of thinking. Also, it is in your immediate circles where a lot of your weaknesses will unfold, especially with friends. If you are not wise enough to realize that your journey is most likely not to resemble that of a friend’s journey, you will continue to fall into the trap of always doing things alike or even together, failing to recognize and appreciate individuality and the gifts there of.

Those who succeed can show you a list of all the things and people they’ve had to say ‘no’ to. Those who continue to struggle don’t say ‘no’ to much. It all falls under the expectation of self-discipline and there’s no such place known as strength in your life where self-discipline doesn’t dwell. Your ability to say ‘no’ at the right time, to the right people will always determine the make-up of your priority list. Your priorities almost never hear ‘no’ because priorities are that and who you cater to the most. If you have a hard time understanding why you can never say ‘no’ to something or someone, the reason is simply because there lies your priority. If you don’t like the priority, change it. Rearrange if you must, but such will never really happen if you never find strength and wisdom to simply say ‘no’. Friends don’t need to understand. You need to understand what your priorities are, friends just simply need to know. Be determined to stay on your path and be honest enough with yourself to know when to say ‘no’. Your ability to do so will make the difference.



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